yeah, what do you need to know? I'm Conrad bloody Keely, I'm your
most boring nightmare, you can't wait to wake up from me and make
some coffee and go about your life.
yeah, this is my art website, and it's all really groovy, man,
yeah, super mellow, dig it. Patterns, colors, wisdom. Peace.
began drawing around the age of three, my mother sometimes lies
and tells me I was two. This was during the war, there was very
little food, and most of it was rationed cans of Spam. In order to
pay the rent, my parents sent me out on the streets to beg, and
there I began to draw what I saw around me, the poverty, the
depression. I drew the shape of changing America, and I drew the
animals, that came out from the jungle and made off with other
children from our village. It was a happy childhood, it made me
the artist that I am.
I live in New York, still during the war. Not much has changed
really, we still eat a lot of Spam from cans. I still enjoy
drawing the animals that come out of the jungle and eat children;
only now the animals are all endangered, and they have a sad,
defeated look about them, which sort of makes you want to hunt
them even more.
an artist I consider myself more of a humorist. If you aren't able
to see what's funny about my art, then you're probably a boring
person, in which case don't even bother yourself with art, stick
with politics and music journalism. If you want to get into art,
you have to laugh, you have to see the absurd in everything, you
have to accept the will of heaven, and understand the little bits
of beauty in a whole lot of ugly which is the internet.
as an artist I'm able to get away with pretty much anything. I can
even get away with not decorating this page if I want to. As an
American resident, however, I can't get away with as much. So I
might have to put a heading on the page that says
"Biography", in which case that is what you will be
reading this text under.
about Conrad, but not a whole lot more, can be found at Wikipedia.